I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
