Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
