At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize