dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
