Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
