Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize