I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize