thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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