But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
