he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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