My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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