I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
