Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
