he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Come see our sink grown plant.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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