i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
