shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Randomize
