butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
