Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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