There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
The cops high fived after they tackled you
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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