I puked a lego.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I have fence marks all over my body
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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