are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
