he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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