I think I am morally bankrupt
only if we run a train.
done.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
