I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
