fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
She's just so happy...and so naked.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
