dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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