I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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