dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
