Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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