it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
