you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
