i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
