The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
