woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
a search helicopter?!
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
