I intend to get homeless drunk
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
