my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I don't deserve a penis
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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