What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Its about making memories worth repressing
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
