Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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