yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
