So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
