Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
so let's talk penis.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
