this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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