the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
