I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
