dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
