I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Come on in and take your pants off
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