Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
