Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
