I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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