You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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